Motivational Monday – Personal Development
14th Jun 2016
Have you ever had a moment in life where something happens at just the right time? Not the perfectly timed photobomb or the funny cat video that someone forwards to cheer you up (though both are equally awesome). I’m talking about something that you come across that really resonates with your soul…
I have had a lot of those moments, especially over the last few years. The one that sticks out the most was when I stumbled upon a book, possibly the best book I have ever read, How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
At the time this book caught me in a transitional phase, coming out of being obese and into my new skin. I had to learn how to deal with the confidence issues that are related to being overweight. It was scary facing the world as a newly skinny person, the reason being that everyone I met from the moment I hit my goal weight just saw me as Brendan. They didn’t know me from before.
It’s the same as if you are trying to deal with your weight-loss journey, or you’ve just come out of a really tough time in your life. You need to put on a brave face because life goes on, it doesn’t wait for you to catch up emotionally. There is a natural mourning process with anything that you leave behind, especially if it was part of your life for a long time. Now this might sound a bit silly to the average bear (especially since bears can’t really understand English) but I had to mourn my weight-loss. I had to deal with the friendships that it ruined because of my attitude; I had to deal with the emotional attachment to food and more importantly I had to realise that coming out of my shell was the next step in my journey of personal development.
I started to read Dale’s book and then stopped, I went out, bought a highlighter and some post it tabs and then carried on reading it. Every single page had something of relevance to my life at the time; it just made perfect sense to me. I realised that handling difficult situations and building new friendships and relationships is actually very easy, in fact a lot of the things that I read are things that humans do some of the time, but not all of the time.
So what I thought I would do today is share 3 principles that are covered in his book. Then in 2 weeks time I will share another three (hopefully by then you’ll have bought your own copy and will be applying these principles to your life).
- Don’t criticise, condemn or complain – If you think about this, it is probably the most important thing you can do for yourself to promote a positive demeanour. Often we want to form our own opinions about a situation, we are quick to be unhappy when things don’t go our way, but sometimes life is like that and we have to try our best to embrace the good and the bad. This is something I am constantly working on because constantly complaining used to be my special party trick. I killed many happy occasions.
- Smile – A smile can light up a room, it can make someone feel as though they have been noticed and ultimately provides a really good energy. “Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, ‘I like you. You make me happy. I’m glad to see you.’” – Dale Carnegie
- Try honestly to see things from the other persons point of view – I have written about this before, and I try to reference it each time I post on social media. You have the power to make someone feel awesome, if you don’t make them feel good and they are already having a tough time then you are making things worse for them. Sometimes we want to scream and shout at people, I’ve lost the plot a few times but realistically I know that sometimes people don’t need judgement they just need some empathy.
There you have my first three, now you might be sitting there thinking; “how does this relate to fitness?” Well, everything in your life is woven together to make you who you are; if you strengthen your body through a tough, challenging workout you strengthen your resolve. If you develop your mind and personal skills you are making your mind fitter and stronger to face the world!
See if you can apply those principles into your life this week, the 1st one was my biggest challenge to myself.
Have a wonderful day! Stay Strong and Keep Moving!